A Few Days or The Rest of My Life

Early in the year for a few days following my accident I didn’t know who anyone was or indeed who or where I was.  Quite frightening but fortunately for me, it lasted a very short time.  But what of those suffering from say Alzheimer’s?  I’ve written several posts on this subject and for that very short time I could totally bond with my fictional character Jane:

My Name is Jane, I think.

They’re calling me Jane
Is that who I am
I am perfectly sane
but I don’t know their plan.
I look in the mirror and what do I see
Someone who vaguely resembles me
But why am I here and why all the tears
They are beginning to scare me, what is there to fear?

 It seems like only yesterday I knew who I was and
Proud, strong and upright my life in my hands.
But now you tell me that isn’t so
Well if I am not me then where did I go?
I remember a time when my children were small
But yesterday and last week I know not at all
Where did those days go and why am I here
I wish you could tell me why did they disappear?

This young woman calls me Mother but I don’t know her at all
She looks kind of familiar, lovely smile, soft hands and all
And the young boys with her they are calling me Gran
But again I don’t know them why are they taking my hand?
Perhaps I knew her when I too was young
When life was before me and everything was fun
And losing one’s self wasn’t even thought of then
So how could I have landed here – is this the end?

 I think I know you – are you a nurse
And where are you taking me, I know the way
Well I did before this curse
Came upon me and befuddled my mind
And now I feel that I have left me behind.
But I am still me though I can’t make you hear
I’m still your mother and hold you all dear
What’s that you say my name is Jane
And I really feel that I’m perfectly sane.

But they’re calling me Jane
Are they talking to me
Is that my name and
Who I used to be?

















9 responses to “A Few Days or The Rest of My Life

  1. That is such an incredibly moving poem. Well done. It is also very sad. My mom has a bit of age-related dementia which I fear will get worse. It is so hard to see this happen to our loved ones. So glad yu are OK now and can still write these amazing words.


    • Thanks Darlene. it wasn’t frightening a the time because I really wasn’t with it but looking back I think that’s the way those like your Mother and mine feel most of the time.


  2. Perfect expression of loss and confusion. I heard on the news yesterday someone has made a drug that actually removes the plaque that forms on the brain.


  3. Lovely poem.
    I lost a few of my marbles with complications about twenty-four years ago. I used to worry about not having a full set. There must be a slight hole in the bag as one or two more have slipped out recently. I’ve stopped worrying about them, I’ve stopped worrying about who I was then and am enjoying who I am now a lot more because of it. 😊


  4. enjoyed reading your poem! Thanks for visiting me back and for the comment 🙂


  5. Pingback: Anther Life Being Well Lived | I choose how I will spend the rest of my life

  6. Pingback: The Deadly Disease | I choose how I will spend the rest of my life

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