55 years on

On June 11, 1967 my two children and I first set foot in New Zealand.

On this date in 2017, I asked the question “Where did the years go?” Click here to read that post.

And now it’s another five years and still I wonder where the time has gone. Much has changed of course since that far-off day when we arrived in this far-off land. The children have grown, moved away and now have their own families. And each has two sons – my strapping young, handsome grandsons. four young men of whom I am justifiably proud (no bias here you understand). Unfortunately 25 years ago, their father, my DYS died and life totally changed for all of us. But it doesn’t come with a choice so “Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again” so sang Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire in the 1936 movie “Swing Time”. So that’s what we did. Here’s a Youtube link showing them singing and dancing together.

So we will celebrate this day and in another five years will celebrate the 60th anniversary!

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Passing Years

As I have said before, I am old. And though mostly I don’t feel my age, one of the ways this is brought back to me is on my children’s birthdays. 

Today, April 11, 2023, my daughter Cate is celebrating her 63rd birthday. How did that happen I ask myself.

 It seems no time since she was a tiny 6 lb 13 oz baby, and then a toddler and a schoolgirl and a university student. Then she married and produced two sons of her own. These big strapping young men also remind me of how old I must be.

So today, I say happy birthday darling to my daughter. May you have many more and be lucky enough to reach my age!

Cate a few weeks ago with her drumming group.
I have seen her looking better, but seldom happier.

A Different Day

Driving home after coffee with a friend today, I passed the cemetery. This is where the ashes of my late husband were put so many years ago.

I am not in the habit of visiting the cemetery. I don’t need to go there to feel near my DYS; he is here with me all the time. But today I was attracted to the place.

As it is so long since I have been there, I had to find out from the staff where he was. Once before when I went there, I told the woman I had lost my husband – but before I could explain she took me into the office and offered tea and tissues.

So today, I was very clear, explaining that it was a while since I had visited. So with map in hand, I found him.

 

it was a lovely day and a beautiful place to sit in quiet contemplation, thinking of all the years we had together, and the years I have spent without him.

It will probably be several years before I go back, but it was a lovely way to spend an hour on a sunny, autumn afternoon.

“Circumstances or people can take away your material possessions,
they can take away your money, and they can take away your health.
But no one can ever take away your precious memories.”
Judith Baxter, Mother, ‘Grandmother, Sister,
Aunt and Friend

 

 

 

A Floral Dance

When I read this post from Heaven Happens today, I was immediately transported back to the time I spent playing companion to that elderly lady in Sussex.

We lived in a very small village, some 6 miles from Chichester. There was no shop but there was a pub and a splendid 12th-century church, complete with Norman tower and a very interesting churchyard. To get to the church one had to traverse Church Lane, a small road with thatched roof cottages along either side. Really a chocolate box scene.

Foolishly, when I changed computers I omitted to save all the photos.

Surrounding our village was a number of other small and equally attractive villages. One was called Apuldram.  This village was still a little removed and revels in its ancient history. Many of the houses date back to the 18th and 19th centuries and some even further back.

Dell Quay, Apuldram

The sea still plays a part in the lives of the inhabitants of the village.  Once boats and the sea were means of livelihood for the people of Apuldram; now there are sailing boats and runabouts anchored in the basin at Dell Quay.

Here too, the church is the centre of this village and it is put to many uses other than holding services. Because of the number of those uses to which the church was now being put, an extension was needed and so the village people started to fundraise. One of the ways to do so was to hold a weekend Festival of Music and Flowers. I wrote at length about this in my early blogging days. If you would like to read that post -here’s a link.

So happy memories of time spent in England, visiting places old and new.

Special thanks to Heaven Happens for reminding me of this wonderful weekend, spent in the English countryside on an autumn weekend.

Making and Saving Memories

The week before David’s wedding – March 1990

Our memories may be happy or sad, joyful or tearful or just plain funny.  Sometimes they are of earth-shattering moment – I clearly remember when Neil Armstrong walked on the moon.  On July 20^th, 1969 I was sitting in the Holiday Inn at Dorval in Montreal and I watched spellbound as a man walked onto the moon.

Memories may be of such momentous events, or a special event in our lives; a wedding, birth of first child or grandchild, or even the unimaginable death of a loved one, but mostly our memories are of our everyday life and this is what we need to record and preserve.  What happened to us and how our lives have been changed by what has happened.

My Father told me I could be and do anything I wanted.  That has had a profound effect on my life and how I have lived it.  Many memories are of Father and his influence.

And getting back to everyday activities.  A visit to a friend, spending time with a friend’s dog, a walk in the park, meeting new people and making new friends, moving to a new country. or a different part of the country.  All of these are worthy of recording.

I am currently in Tauranga on the East Coast of the North Island dogsitting for a friend while she skis in Canada. You may remember this little dog. Back in 2013 following the death of Miss Lotte, I was given a poodle by an acquaintance, but then I decided to go to Florence so Bella was left with a friend and here she has remained. So we dog- share and whenever I feel the need of some dog time, I come to visit her. So more memories being made of time spent with friends in this lovely part of our country and particularly with this little dog.

And now I should like to share a memory of some 20 years ago.  I wrote this in February 2012 and I still laugh about it.  Funny now but not at the time.  I’m not the only one.

And for my friends in the Northern Hemisphere from a beautiful hot, sunny Tauranga

Christmas Is Coming

“Christmas is coming and the geese are getting fat
Please put a penny in the old man’s hat;
If you haven’t got a penny a ha’penny will do,
If you haven’t got a ha’penny then God bless you!”
Nursery rhyme and Christmas carol (frequently sung as a round)

When I was growing up in London following the end of WW2 we always had goose for Christmas dinner.  Not for us a turkey.  In fact, I don’t ever remember having turkey at home until long after I was married.  Quite late on Christma Eve father would go to the market and buy a goose.  They, of course, were reduced at this time so that’s when he went.

Later, after moving to New Zealand with my DYS (Dashing Young Scotsman), I remember a particular Christmas at home with my family.   By this time, the late 60s, goose had been superseded by turkey and Father in company of his son-in-law, took off as usual to purchase the bird.  Well, these two men purchased the bird and then in a festive mood did a round of various pubs on the way home.

When they did eventually arrive home, much later than expected by Mother for dinner, they were without the bird.  It had been left in one of the hostelries they had visited.  Mother was less than pleased, she didn’t drink and didn’t think it was at all funny.  I had to decide whose side I was on and while secretly siding with Father and DYS I nodded assent and support to Mother.

Some time later, and rather more merrier I might say, they arrived home complete with bird.  Mother was placated, a late dinner was served and much laughter followed  And the story of the bird was told on many Christmases that followed.

What happy memories.

And now, did you know?

• Clement Moore’s 1823 poem “Twas the Night Before Christmas” was the catalyst for the reinvention of St Nicholas into the jolly, fat image of Santa we now know?
• Also invented by Moore, Santa’s travels are invariably connected to reindeer.  In the poem, they are pictured charging through a winter sky complete with strong, elaborate horns.  But in winter reindeer lose their horns so are Santa’s reindeer all female or are they castrated males?
• Moore omitted to tell us that St Nicholas was Turkish.  He was real and was born in Patara, Turkey.  He was an early Christian and in the 4th Century, he became bishop of the district of Demre where some of his bones can still be visited.  Little fact is known of him, only oral legends relating to his goodness and kindness to children.
• Another poem, this one by Frank Baum (who wrote The Wizard of Oz) told that Santa lived in a valley called Ho Ho Ho.  American marketers quickly picked up on the poem and Ho Ho Ho became Santa brand’s catch cry.
• The song Jingle Bells never mentions Christmas and has no connection to Christmas.  It was originally composed for America’s Thanksgiving festival in 1857.
• Nobody knows when Jesus was born or died. For many centuries people in the northern hemisphere celebrated the winter solstice, the shortest day and the turning point in the long, often hard, cold winter.  Some 300 years after Jesus’ (guessed at) death date, Pope Julius I announced that 25th December would be the date to celebrate the birth of Jesus.  As Christianity spread around the world, this date took over the existing festivities and became “Christmas”.  The word Christmas didn’t come into being until 1032 AD.
• The bible doesn’t say that three kings visited the baby Jesus but refers to “Wise men from the east”.  They may well have been astronomers (they did follow a star) or Zoroastrian priests and the fact that the three gifts, Gold, Frankincense and Myrrh are mentioned is the possible basis for assuming there were three visitors.
• And the gifts they brought.  Gold and Frankincense would be acceptable but in ancient times Myrrh was very expensive and used in embalming dead bodies and was burned at funerals to disguise the smell of bodies that hadn’t been embalmed.  Why would it be brought to a newborn child?
• And everybody’s favourite – Charles Dickens “A Christmas Carol”.  There have been 14 versions of this story.
• Four Calling Birds in the song “The Twelve Days of Christmas”.  Originally it was four colly birds, colly being the ancient word for black (as in collier and coal) so colly birds were blackbirds.  As time went by colly fell out of use and didn’t make sense so people started saying four calling birds.  This doesn’t make sense either.
• Decorated evergreen trees have been part of December celebrations in Europe for many centuries reminding everyone that spring is just around the corner.  The decorated Christmas tree became accepted in the UK when Queen Victoria, Prince Albert and the children were depicted in the “Illustrated London News” standing around a lavishly decorated Christmas tree.
• The use of X as in Xmas is not at all invalid or disrespectful.  The word Christ was never part of Jesus’ name, it is a title assigned by later worshippers in Greek meaning ‘the anointed one’.  In ancient Greece, the letter chi was written with a symbol very like an X and the title assigned to Jesus was Xristos and was frequently abbreviated to just X.  So writing Christmas as Xmas has been considered acceptable for some 1000 years.  Note early publications were charged by the number of letters so using X in Xmas was encouraged.
• The wassail ritual was an ancient pre-Christian custom of drinking a toast to the sun after the northern mid-winter approximately 25 December and hopes for a bountiful harvest in the coming warmer months. Hence the song ‘Here we come a-wassailing’ was a gathering of friends drinking a toast.  “Waes Hael” in ancient English means “Be healthy” and the usual drink was a mixture of spices, apple juice and eggs.  (Give me a G&T any time).
• Christmas was cancelled in England in the 1640s when Puritan law forbade churches to open on Christmas Day and banned home decorations, celebrations, carol singing and the creating of Nativity scenes.  December 25 was declared a day of everyday work and fasting.  The outraged populace made Christmas observances in secret until the Monarchy was restored in 1660 and King Charles II restored Christmas.
• And finally, a horse named Santa Claus won the Epsom Derby in 1964.

So there you have my list – as my son always says I have a fund of useless information.  Enjoy it anyway.

 

 

On This Day

Sunday, November 17 was a cold, foggy day in 1957.  All those years ago and I was a naive young girl sitting painting my nails and talking to my family.  Excited, yes and somewhat scared at what I was getting myself into. what I was about to do.

Our wedding 1957

This was the day I was going to marry my Dashing Young Scotsman.  Oh so many years ago.

I clearly remember sitting in the car on the way to the church with my own, supportive Dad who asked me again was I sure that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with the young man waiting at the church.  He told me that there was still time to change my mind.  Of course, I was sure and no I didn’t change my mind.

And the Dashing Young Scotsman became the son my Father didn’t have.; his own son having died as a small baby.  My parents loved him as did my sisters.

So on this day 60 years ago, I married my soulmate and for the next 41 years, we celebrated the fact that we had found each other.

What a long time ago, no doubt before many of you were born, but what a glorious day it was for me.  And how glad I am that I didn’t change my mind on the way to the church.

“Circumstances or people can take away your material possessions,
they can take away your money,
and they can take away your health.
But no one can ever take away your precious memories.”
Judith Baxter, Blogger, Mother, Grandmother, Friend
1938-

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Voices

“and there was a new voice which you slowly
recognized as your own, that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper into the world,
determined to do the only thing you could do —
determined to save the only life you could save.”

 

Today I read this post “I Have aVoice “from Joss at Depth of a Woman.  I immediately responded in the comments section – Another good post and as Mary Oliver says in The Journey “One day you finally knew what you had to do, and began, though the voices around you kept shouting their bad advice “

The quote above is also part of the same poem by Mary Oliver.  As Joss says, we are all held up at some time in our life by these voices, whether from friends, acquaintances or others, or even that voice in our own subconscious.  These voices choose to manipulate us and it’s only once we recognise that, that we are able to move forward.

So today I urge you to ignore those voices and take the first or the next, step on your journey.  Only you can determine where you are going.

OK Life Coach hat off for the day!

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And today the sun is shining here so no excuses for not getting out and walking or maybe even doing some work in the garden.  Since last year’s adventure, I have had a team of people who come in every 4 weeks to weed, mow the lawn, clip hedges etc.  They also plant for me.  But though I am in no way a gardener, I miss doing some of these things.  So today I am going to pot the plants I bought yesterday (in the pouring rain) and then after a visit to the audiologists (one result from the adventure) I shall return to sit in the garden with my book and a cup of tea.  How’s that for a good plan for the day.

 

On This Day

I have just been going down memory lane.  I found a box full of letters to and from my Dashing Young Scotsman before and shortly after we were married.  At that time my DYS was a chauffeur for a car rental company and he was away from home for weeks at a time.  In case you don’t remember or are too young to know, in 1957 many Americans came to the UK and then from there, they toured Europe.  Self-drive cars were around but many preferred to be driven.

I was delighted to find these letters from 60 years ago – yes I am that old, particularly as I don’t keep letters, cards etc for any length of time.

So having read one dated 18 September 1957 I decided to look at my earlier blog posts to see what I was thinking and/or doing at that time.

This blogging journey started on March 1, 2011, so the first stop was 18 September 2011.

On that day I talked about My September Years and reminisced about the great life I had lived up until that day.

18 September 2012 I continued the story with Yet More on the Bonnets.  If you were following my blog then you might remember that Sallyann at Photographic Memories found some bonnets sitting in the back of a disused taxi and suggested that I might write a story on this.  Well, I did.  I hope you enjoy it.

18 September 2013 found me in Oxford with my sister visiting with my blogging pal, Sallyann of Photographic Memories fame.  We had a great day and as Sallyann lived in Oxford then, we saw many things not usually seen by tourists.  A great day was had by all and it was particularly memorable because I met a blogging pal In Real Life.

18 September 2014 I was working through Writing 101 and on this day the challenge was to write about loss.  I chose to talk about Miss Lotte my small Tibetan Spaniel and my faithful companion.  Unfortunately, Miss Lotte’s life was short but sweet and I still miss her.

18 September 2015.  This was a particularly hard time for me as my late love, The Architect had died a month before.  So there was only one post in September that year – Missing You.  Oh, how raw were the feelings at that time and how unfair I thought it was that our lovely partnership was cut short.

18 September 2016.  There were few posts in September that year.  I was recovering from my latest adventure aka accident and the closest post to this date is Words and More Words.  The theme is obvious from the title, and I talked about Elizabeth George a favourite author, an appointment card to visit an Otolaryngologist and other meanderings in this ancient mind.

So now to today, 18 September 2017.  What thoughts are going around in my mind?  I have had a pleasant but short interaction with my No 3 grandson.  Oh, how I love to talk with these young men.  He is very solicitous of his Granma and always happy to help in any way. Today he moved plant pots around for me.  Yes, I could have done this myself, but he brought them down the outside stairs and placed them along the front of the hedge.  Now all I have to do is buy plants for them. So a visit later today to my favourite store aka the garden centre.

Today the sun is shining brightly and all the doors and windows are open.  This follows torrential rain and wind yesterday and we learn that rain, thunderstorms, high winds, and snow are on the cards for many over the next 24 hours in the South Island.  I hope Grandson No 4 is safe and warm in Christchurch.

We also hear that air travel is disrupted in Auckland as the Airport will be affected after a fuel pipeline from a refinery in Northland was temporarily shut-down.  Auckland is our busiest airport and Airport chief executive Adrian Littlewood said some 27 domestic and international flights were cancelled over the weekend.  So I suggest there are many disgruntled/unhappy travellers.

We read that former Napier City Councillor Peter Beckett has been found guilty of the first-degree murder of his Canadian wife following a jury trial in Canada.  Guilty of drowning his wife, Laura Letts-Beckett, on Upper Arrow Lake in August 2010 and was handed an automatic life sentence with a minimum non-parole period of 25 years.

And the good news?  A Catholic priest held hostage for almost four months in the besieged southern city of Marawi has been rescued hours after a deadly battle between Philippine soldiers and Islamic State-allied militants.   Father Teresito “Chito” Soganub was found abandoned with another hostage near a mosque early Sunday, one of three militant strongholds that have fallen to government forces over the past several days.Father Soganub had been held captive since militants attacked his Saint Mary’s Parish during the siege of Marawi on May 23.

So enough meandering on this Monday.  I hope you all have had a pleasant weekend and are looking forward to this new week.

Found on Pinterest

 

 

 

 

The Glorious 12th

Here in New Zealand, it is already August 12th  the official start of Britain’s 121-day-long grouse shooting season and always known as The Glorious 12th.

According to The Telegraph “The sport, which always begins on August 12th each year, has been an integral part of the countryside calendar for decades, although having once been an aristocratic hobby, it’s increasingly at the centre of rows over animal cruelty and class.”

If you are interested you can read more about this bird here.

Many years ago as a new bride, I was called by my DYS (Dashing Young Scotsman) to go to Euston Station in London to pick up a brace of grouse that he had shot the day before.  So with father, we took off to do just that.

But I asked, what to do with the birds and was told by my DYS that they should be kept in a dark cupboard and hung up by their feet until the feet fell off, at which time they would be ready for plucking etc.

And would he be home by that time, I asked.  Oh yes, don’t worry about that was his reply.

So following instructions, we hung the birds in the cupboard under the stairs until DYS came home and dealt with them.  I can’t say that I enjoyed the resultant meal.  The bird was far too gamey for me, but this is yet another memory to put into my memory chest.

 

 

 

“Circumstances or peoplecan take away yourmaterial possessions,
they can take away your money andthey can take away your health.
But no one can ever take away yourprecious memories.

So, don’t forget to make time and take theopportunities
to make memories every day.”

Judith Baxter  1938 –
Blogger, Mother, Grandmother, Sister and friend.

Note –  Photo of Red Grouse courtesy of Wikipedia

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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