It’s Wellington on a good day

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This has been the most perfect January day. Temperatures in and around 30 degrees. This is hot in this temperate climate and the pool at my son’s house was in high demand..

Lunch at a friend’s house but we decided it was too hot to eat outside so three elderly ladies ate lunch inside. Much laughter, exchange of stories and general well being. Some three and half hours later we decided that lunch was over.

How incongruous on this hot day the man delivering winter firewood arrived.

Back to lunch and how different was today’s lunch to yesterday’s.  Another beautifulWellington day but this time lunch with a friend who has dementia. Added to that is the problem that she is unable to walk without her Zimmer frame and you can see lunch was not a bundle of laughs.

I picked up my friend and we went to the beautiful Wellington Botanic Gardens. 25 hectares of landscaped gardens, protected natural bush, specialised plant collections and of course the famous Lady Norwood Rose Garden.  Nestled into the Rose Garden is the Begonia House set in a Victorian conservatory. And at the side of the Begonia House under the same roof is a delightful cafe. As you can imagine on such a lovely day it was full of people chatting, laughing and enjoying lunch.

Our lunch was a quieter more somber affair.  My friend who used to be the centre of any gathering was very quiet.  She has trouble remembering. Oh, she remembers names and who you are.  She has difficulty remembering events and words to describe her thoughts and feelings.

How scared she must be and how scared will her family be. She is aware that she isn’t making sense and gets annoyed with herself and there’s no way for me to help.

After a short run around the waterfront (in the car of course) I delivered her back home to her lovely husband.  I made us all a cup of tea and then left once again saying thanks to whichever god is looking out for me.

I really feel for this once vibrant, educated and intelligent woman whose life is now confined to their apartment and who now has to wait for a friend or family member to take her out. When I think of all the ills that could befall one, this would be the hardest to bear.

 

 

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21 thoughts on “It’s Wellington on a good day

  1. I agree there is nothing worse. I feel for your friend and for you to have to see her go through this. What a way to end a wonderful life. We must be thankful everyday for the good health we have.

  2. So sad. I have a relative who is beginning to lose it and her husband has taken over everything, even the cooking and cleaning. As Darlene said, we must be thankful every day for the good health we have. You are a good friend, Judith!

  3. It is sad and frightening. It is good she has folks that love and care for her. Taking her out to lunch and a drive not only is a gift to her but to her husband as well.

  4. I’ve been told that although your memory fails, your feelings linger, happy thoughts and happy times still leave you feeling happy, even if you can’t remember why. 😊

      • I know how difficult it can be to make somebody be happy. Maybe you can draw on your memories for your friend and recreate an experience you both enjoyed. An Ice-cream along the prom? A children’s concert? An old movie? A visit to a flower shop to pick out a bouquet? Or what about a little music box with little pretty things in it. Or a simple game of tiddlywinks.
        I’m sure anything which raises a smile or two will be appreciated. 😊

    • Patti, I’m the one who isles see. We’ve shared many happy memories over 18 years. I know if the boot was on the other foot she’d do the same for me

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