“Death crept quietly into the room
Where once there was laughter, talk and tears
Now it is no more
Silence reigns
Death has replaced life.”
Judith Baxter 1938 –
It was just another Thursday for me and for many others. But for one family at least, it was not. I arrived at the hospice to be told that a patient had died.
I had got to know this particular patient over three weeks that he had been in the Hospice. A cheerful youngish man (difficult to say just how old he was – maybe 40) he was a joy to speak to and was always surrounded by his wife and family. I do not know this man’s name. Only first names are used at the hospice, but I was cheered by him on Thursdays when I saw him.
He had obviously come to terms with his life ending but I don’t think his wife and family will have yet.
So for his wife and family I offer this poem from David Harkins (replacing the pronoun she with he):
“You can shed tears that she is gone
or you can smile because she has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that she’ll come back,
or you can open your eyes and see all that she’s left.
Your heart can be empty because you can’t see her
or you can be full of the love you shared…………
…………Or you can do what she’d want:
Smile, open your eyes, love and go on.”
David Harkins 1959 – Silloth, Cumbria, UK
Read the full poem hereMy rainbow
And I will share my rainbow with them.
Related articles
- Thursday Lunch (growingyoungereachday.wordpress.com)
- A Hospice House Story: How Phil Hummel’s End of Life Journey in Hospice Gave His Family Peace of Mind and Granted Him a Gentle, Dignified Death (leoadambiga.wordpress.com)
- Another Wedding (growingyoungereachday.wordpress.com)
- Hospice Story: Charlie (thoughtstomull.com)
I choose how I will spend the rest of my life 
I love your post, Judith. It shows that you’re a very caring person. Very good choice of poem for his wife and family, I think. Your rainbow looks great! Thanks for sharing.
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Thanks auntyuta. 🙂
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I think the Hospice offer bereavement support to family after a loved one has died don’t they Judith? Lovely poem to share with us.
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yes they do offer support during the stay in hospice and afterwards. The family is not left on its own. 🙂
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I just hope I can die home in my own bed.
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YES cARL – THAT IS MY WISH TOO.
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Oops – didn’t look at the screen before I pressed send!
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This is very moving. Working in such a place must ask you many questions and I am really in awe that you can. The repetition of scenarios like this would be very difficult for me to handle. The warmth you have within you is really impressive
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I am in awe of the people who spend their last days in this hospice and of the people, whether medical or other staff, who tend to them.
Thanks for your comment. It is appreciated.
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what a beautiful poem. You were a blessing in his life for this short time.
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Thank you Joss. I think I gain more from Thursday than anybody else.
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So sad…. I hate death! It comes to take away so much joy. Thanks for sharing the rainbow. it seems to say “there’s some hope somewhere” just that with physical eyes we can’t see. I wish the family the strength to bear his loss.Amen!
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The week before we had a wedding at the hospice. That certainly shows that hope springs eternal (even in the face of impending death).
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Beautiful post, thanks for sharing the poem. I had never read it before.
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It is a beautiful poem and a favourite.
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I’m sure your presence at the hospice center is a healing balm for many. That is a great poem, a reminder that life goes on, and we have a choice how to live it. I know you’ve got that figured out; you are a shining example. Always love seeing your rainbow, and that you share it freely with others.
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Thanks Patti but I am sure that I get so much more from my Thursday lunches than they do.
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