12 | May | 2011 | I choose how I will spend the rest of my life

Daily Archives: May 12, 2011

I am Becoming the Woman I’ve Wanted

Posted on May 12, 2011 | 27 comments

“I am becoming the woman I’ve wanted,
grey at the temples, soft body delighted, cracked up by life
with a laugh that’s known bitter but past it, got better,
knows she’s a survivor –
that whatever comes, she can outlast it.
I am becoming a deep weathered basket.”
Jayne Relaford Brown, American poet and teacher of Creative Writing.

This poem Finding Her Here opens the book I am Becoming the Woman I’ve Wanted.

Today’s blog was ‘inspired’ by a comment received on an earlier post. I am sure that the commenter did not mean any disparagement but said words to the effect that he was surprised to find such a well-written blog and by a 72-year-old widow at that.

So I began to think what do others expect of older widows?

When my eldest grandson was at kindergarten the class was asked to talk about their grandmothers. Most children apparently, gave glowing comments on how their grandmothers baked or knitted. James piped up that his grandmother wore a hard hat and went on building sites – I did.
I wonder how Ruth Rendell’s grandchildren would describe her? Ruth Rendell is a Socialist baroness and is the author of the highly successful Inspector Wexford mysteries Including those of Wexford, she has written more than 70 books and is still writing well into her 80s.
And Barbara Walters is well known to all who live in North America. This vibrant American broadcast journalist and author also is in her 80s. A year ago she underwent heart surgery and she is still involved and asking probing questions on air .
Isabel Allende is a Chilean novelist, author of several novels and a short fiction collection, as well as plays and stories for children. Born in 1942, she has received international acclaim for her writing.
And the list goes on – Jean Auel, author of Earth’s Children® books, a series of novels set in prehistoric Europe is 75 and still writing;
Kuki Gullmann of whom I wrote in an earlier post is 68 years old. Novelist and founder of the Gullmann Memorial Foundation in honour of her husband and son who were both killed in Africa;
Maya Angelou, born 1928, is an American author and poet who has been called “America’s most visible black female autobiographer”.
Apologies to the many amazing older women I have left out. This is not because I think the accomplishments of those listed here are of greater worth, but simply because I would need to write for a couple of weeks to cover them all.

So to the person who made the comment – I thank you for the gracious things you said about my blog, but draw your attention to the fact that I still have many more years to live and many more adventures to have. Writing my blog is just one of them.